You've only got one life to live....make it count

Goodbye, so long and thanks for all the fish...

2006-07-06T11:00:00.000-05:00

The dynamics of this have changed.

It's no longer what it once was.

It's time to say goodbye.

Take care of you and those you love.

I've had a good time but it's time for me to go.

Peace. Out.

italian training camp

2006-07-05T12:26:00.000-05:00


Should have gotten McBride in on this training camp, maybe then he wouldn't have gotten his nose busted.

2006-07-03T09:24:00.000-05:00

You Are 72% Lady

Overall, you are a refined lady with excellent manners.
But you also know when to relax and not get too serious about etiquette

Are You A Lady?

OOOOooooo........lookit tha purdy colors...

2006-07-01T10:28:00.000-05:00

Don't know how I did it, but somehow I sprained my foot. I finally broke down and went to the ER to find out why my foot was hurting so badly. Yeah, some sort of stupid human trick I did when I wasn't looking.

Damn I'm so freakin smart. NOT!!

So I've learned something here....

Plus Equals

Should know more about what's going on next week.

Till then, send chocolate or some reasonable facsimile thereof!

No regrets or sad goodbyes...

2006-06-24T07:18:00.000-05:00

It seems that some people steamroll their way into your life, while others tiptoe quietly about it, either briefly or for years on end.

In this case there are two that did both, however for only a short time, for that time I am grateful. As you may or may not remember I told you about Mrs. B at work. While the doctor thought her fall and breaking of her hip would be her undoing, at 103 she was as stubborn as she was old. She did make it back to the facility. For that I am grateful, she proved the doctors wrong. However, in the end, her age and tired body finally gave in to the pain that had eventually taken over her life since her fall. She passed away quietly in the night just a few short hours ago.

Thinking of her now, with a tear streaming down my face, I can't help but smile. Yes, she is the one that just steamrolled her way through my life, however briefly. I'm glad to have had the honor of caring for her and being able to say that I was her nurse. She taught me alot about what it means to be a nurse and to be human. More importantly, how to be humane. For that she'll never be forgotten. I can honestly say now that I'm happy for her she's gone, she's in a place now free of pain and my last hours with her were spent comforting her and giving her the best care I could. To that end, I have no regrets. As well, I can only pray that she's happy, healthy and whole.

As for those that tiptoe about...

I remember what it was like being an aide. The work back breaking and never quite feeling like you were appreciated. Either by the administration, nurses or patients. As a nurse now, I make it a point to thank "my girls" as I refer to them and let them know that I recognize the hard work they do and how much I appreciate them. I never want to be that nurse that I resented who never took notice of the work I did.

When I very first started, one of the aides that I first learned her name was Jameila, I could always remember because she had it tattooed on the side of her neck in pretty script. She preferred to be called Jamie, but I could rarely remember that because I always looked to her permanent name tag as a reminder of what her name was. God I suck when it comes to remembering things...anyways...She always showed up for work when she was supposed to, being a single mom of three adorable children that she lived her life for, she relied on that income. She lived and loved her kids to the fullest. She was always quiet, going about providing some of the kindest care that I've ever had the pleasure of seeing. I didn't get to know her unfortunately, yet I always made it a point to let her know how much it was I appreciated what she did. She always softly laughed and thanked me. I'm so grateful now that I made it my policy to do so.

Wednesday night it was discovered that she and her three beautiful children had been brutally murdered in their home. Now she's gone forever and I mourn for the loss. Only because I never got to know her better. She kept her distance as it turns out from pretty much everyone, preferring to just do her job and go home to her kids. If there could be a silver lining to this dark cloud it's that she at least will be forever with her children and her children with her. If you're interested you can read more about the story here and here and here. All I ask is that you take a minute and read about them, this quiet and unasuming family that loved and lived quietly.

Remember that tragedy can strike at any time.

Live so that you have no regrets or sad goodbyes, that way when you cry for the person lost, it will be for the person and not for the things you should have done.

This just in...

2006-06-20T12:24:00.000-05:00

Donald Rumsfeld briefed the President this morning. He told Bush that 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq.

To everyone's amazement, all of the color ran from Bush's face and he collapsed onto his desk, head in hands, visibly shaken, almost whimpering.

Finally, he composed himself and asked Rumsfeld, "Just exactly how many is a brazillion?"

2,996...

2006-06-17T16:06:00.000-05:00

Please if you can, join me in celebrating a worthwhile cause...

2,996

"What is this number you keep referring to?" You may be asking your computer screen. Well, the best way to understand it is to go here.

Jen, a wonderful blogger friend of mine is involved and due to how 9/11 has affected me and my personal life, I decided I wanted to partake in this as well.

No better fitting a tribute than to celebrate those loved and lost in my opinion.

Should you wish to do so as well, just follow the directions at the end of the post and I look forward to seeing you on 11 September 2006.

In light of my recent birthday...

2006-06-14T16:23:00.000-05:00

25 SIGNS YOU HAVE GROWN UP

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. (damn!)

2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. (Wanna bet??)

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

4. 6:00 a.m. Is when you get up, not when you go to bed. (No, I go to bed at 8a.m. thank you)

5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.

6. You watch the Weather Channel.

7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up."

8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.

9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."

10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.

11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.

12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore. (Yes I do...5a.m.!)

13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.

14. You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers. (I feed my cat White Castles thank you!)

15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt. (My couch is the energy sucking force behind why my mom never gets off of it!)

16. You take naps. (I have to or else, yanno cuz of work. Although I do know of some who take old man naps...*snicker*)

17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.

18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.

19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests. (I go to the gas station, then once those are lost I go to the GROCERY store for condoms thank you!...OMG I think I may be getting old)

20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit." (Hell I can't buy a pint of Guinness for that!)

21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time. (Even if I am about to head off to bed at 8a.m.)

22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."

23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work. (That's my story and I'm sticking to it!)

24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar. (Damn skippy, you seen those prices?!?)

25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking "Oh shit what the hell happened?"

Bonus:

26. You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old ass.

Actually I found a few, but then again given that I work 3rd shift, that might be the reason *cough*........A special thanks to my Aunt for sending me this list.....now I've 3 months to think of a way to get even....*wicked cackle*

Talk about heebeegeebee's...

2006-06-06T09:12:00.000-05:00

I tried killng a spider just a few minutes ago.

I wasn't sucessful.

It came back.

With one leg broken and just dangling there.

I think it's out to get me now (anyone can ask my one brother, Kenny, how terrified of spiders I am).

Hellllllpppppppp~~~~shit!!!!!! As I was typing this the feker did in fact come back!

Instead of grabbing just one shoe like I did the first time I grabbed two!

I'm gonna kill this sucker if it's the last thing I do!

The chase is on......

10 Minutes never felt more like an eternity...~Update 2~

2006-06-06T05:10:00.000-05:00

Well I am happy to report that Mrs. B is back!

She survived her hip surgery and has come back to my facility, however she's not on my unit just yet. I was talking with the unit clerk who said she's not looking well and is on heavy duty pain killers. Given her age, I say give the woman what she needs to be comfortable, but hey that's just me.

At 103 (almost 104, in August) I just hope that I'm just as fiesty and lionhearted at half her age, let alone live to see her age.

I'm just happy that she proved the Doctor wrong.

Her fall wasn't her undoing.

Oy!

2006-06-04T16:48:00.000-05:00

The insistent ringing finally pierces through my sleep only to have me fumbling looking about for the phone in a stupor, you know the kind, where you're half awake and half asleep.

"Hello?" I asked sleepily at 8 a.m. on a Sunday morning. "You've got to get up and come and get me at the ER" says my mum rather urgently, or would I say frantically? Either way, however she says what she does it wakes me completely. "The ER??" I ask now not just awake but confused as to why my mum would be in the ER and why so early on a Sunday no less. "I was stabbed" is my mum's reply. Now being the fatalist that I am, I've gone from being confused to being panicked. "I'll explain when you get here" she says, "No you'll feking explain now" I replied just this side of furious. My mum and I have never gotten along by any stretch of the imagination. Afterall, she is my mum, having said that, I can rant about her but damn if anyone else hurts her!

Throwing back the covers and getting hastily dressed and being forever grateful that we literally only live a stone's throw from the nearest hospital (literally it takes all of 5 minutes to walk to the entrance to the ER), I arrive to find that indeed she had been stabbed. Once in the thigh and my running down the street to get to the hospital required me to walk back to my flat to retrieve my car as my mother cannot walk.

So on the 2 minute ride home, she explains to me how it is she came to be stabbed.

"Well you see, I had this huge cake of soap from Pier 1 Imports and you know how expensive they can be, and well it was a HUGE cake of soap so I got this idea (I hear a groan forming in the back of my throat) to take a knife and cut it in half"...it was at this point I had to interrupt her to ask...."YOU stabbed yourself??"...at least she had the decency to blush.."Yes, but let me finish, it wasn't like it was on purpose or anything"...Knowing how I am and how I like to figure things out I let her go on..."Anyways, like I was saying I got a knife and realized that a regular steak knife wouldn't do, so I went back into the kitchen and got a butcher knife" (can you possibly see where this is leading?)"And then went back into the bathroom and put the soap on my leg and jabbed the knife into it" Knowing that some surfers use soap to wax their surf boards so that it repels water I can only imagine how fast the knife went through the soap...then it was at this point where I slepped myself in the forehead, when I should have slapped her instead. She goes on to say "I got myself to the ER and explained what happened and they stitched me up. (I wish I could remember how many stitches it took both inside and out, but this happened a few years ago and I can't recall except to say it was in the double digits) The doctor took one look at me and saw where the knife blade went into my leg 3 inches and it didn't even hit muscle let alone bone" Mom says with some sort of sick and twisted pride. The doctor asks mom "You don't exercise much do you?"

Her response?........*giggling* "No, how'd you guess?"

Say it with me........."OY!"

10 Minutes never felt more like an eternity...~Update 1~

2006-05-31T08:36:00.000-05:00

As I know it to be, Mrs. B is in stable condition. Yet she's not been to surgery for the repair to her hip.

As well, something I found out...

Mrs. B has this thing........call it a proclivity or what you will.....Mrs. B hates having roommates. For whatever the reason they piss her off. Found out that the reason behind her fall this past weekend was due to the fact that she was toddling off to the other side of the room to her roommates' side to turn off the roommates' over bed light. One might believe that to be a generous and selfless act of a 103 year old woman to look after her roommate that way. I can assure you....it's not.

Mrs. B wants things to be a certain way and if it's not that way........she'll make it that way, come hell or high water. She doesn't like bright light or loud noise. So she was taking care of the bright light issue. I just found out about the loud noise (which surprised me cuz she's so damn hard of hearing) because one of her daytime aides suspected that Mrs. B didn't actually fall, however was possibly pushed by her roommate out of self defense. You see...Mrs. B has a history. Five years ago this same aide walked in and found Mrs. B with a pillow over her hospice roommates' head trying to smother her because the roommate was making to much noise.

So I guess.......take a deep breath, I realize you've just put 2 and 2 together and came up with the fact that had Mrs. B been successful, she probably would have been the oldest female (98 at the time) to stand trail for murder.....it's possible that anything could happen, we weren't in the room, so we truly don't know what made her fall.

Despite this new information and how she first treated me.......I gotta give the lady some credit, to survive this long.....give her what she wants! Some peace and freakin quiet!

She's earned it!

10 Minutes never felt more like an eternity...

2006-05-30T00:29:00.000-05:00

On my first day of work, during my first med pass as a new nurse I met Mrs. B. I was training and had never passed meds before. The nurse training me had 35 years experience and her motto was to throw me into the mix figuring there was no better way to learn but to do what needed to be done.

I learned that night how to treat brand new nurses, as well as how to not treat them.

Now that I'm a bit more "seasoned" it takes me about 5 to 5 1/2 hours to get all 47 residents their respective meds. That first night however, it took me 6 hours to pass meds to about half that amount. Needless to say I've improved by leaps and bounds in that time....either out of a need to survive or just plain stubborness. Take your pick.

Needless to say, Mrs. B who is 103 years old is used to getting her meds at a certain time each night and if they aren't passed to her in a timely manner, she WILL hunt you down and let you know that you're late.

My first vision of Mrs. B was of this short, slightly rotund little old lady, barefooted hobbling her way down the hall. Walker in hand, she trundled down the hall to where I was. In one of the oldest and highest pitched shakey voices, I get a verbal berating that would curl your hair. All the while shaking her walker at me as if she was going to club me like a baby seal, she lets me know that I'm late with her meds and she wants them right this instant.

Hellooooooooo Mrs. B!!

Only takes one time for that sort of scene to happen for me to learn my lesson and learn it quick-like.

As time has progressed I've actually gotten her her meds early and she's ever grateful and lets me know how much she appreciates the fact that I get her her meds early. All I can think is........"Do I have dumbass written on my forehead?"

This Saturday past, I heard an aide frantically cry out for help. It was Mrs. B. She was on the floor, right hip outwardly rotated, all twisted up and crying out in pain. Yeah, you guessed it. She fell and broke her hip and fractured we don't know how many ribs. With her weight and the pain she was in, despite the heavy meds she's on that I had given her about 2 hours earlier (we're talking meds in the amount that could drop a horse....at 103, I honestly think that's how she manages through the day), there was no way in hell I was going to get her off the floor. Even if I had the ability and all the aides in the place to help, she just wouldn't be able to bear weight. So I had one of the aides grab a nursing supervisor and with her help and the unit clerk processing all the paper work on my behalf, I laid on the floor (yes in my whites even.......*gags*) along side Mrs. B, trying to comfort as best I could. I knew that EMT's were en route and would be there to take over in 10 minutes, it was the longest 10 minutes that I can ever remember spending in my life.

There is just something heart wrenching about hearing a 103 year old lady whimper and cry out in pain. After the EMT's had gone I spoke with her doctor and the first thing out of his mouth was "Well, we probably won't be seeing her again". Yes, I chastised him and told him not to say that, however he did remind me of her age and she would have trouble surviving surgery and even if she did survive, she may not be the same.

I think I'd rather have her chase me with her walker to beat the hell outta me than the alternative.

Didn't expect to take this so personally.....

I say be careful who you mess with...

2006-05-24T10:00:00.000-05:00

Watch Video Clip

Ohhh, here we go again...

2006-05-19T05:49:00.000-05:00

Wondering what's been up?

Well...

Believe it or not (God knows I'm finding it difficult to believe) I'm back in school. Going to finish up and get my RN. Yanno, be a "Real Nurse" . Pardon the dripping sarcasm there. People who make the distinction that LPN's aren't real nurses have no concept what a nurse does, let alone an LPN.

So to alleviate anymore confusion, I've decided to finish up and get my RN because there are more opportunities for me as an RN than there are as an LPN. While being an LPN is a good start, the only job I'd be able to do is working in nursing homes, which is fine. For some. Just not me. It's valuable experience, don't get me wrong and it will pay for my schooling (the wages I earn from the job, even though the facility will pay my tuition, I'd rather not so I can leave when I'm done and not work for them any longer than I have to).....I want to work in the Emergency Room/Department (depends on where you live as to what they call it.), I'd also like to do so many other things because I'm interested in so many different aspects of nursing. It's just to do most any of them requires me to have a bit more education.

So.......

Here we go again!

Why I love my job, reason #192...

2006-05-18T16:51:00.000-05:00

As many of you know, I currently am working in a nursing home. One of my favorite residents is this one old man, to protect his privacy I'll call him Mr. Roberts.

One day last weekend, Saturday I'm thinking, he appeared to be very sad and depressed. I asked him if there was anything wrong.

"Yes, Nurse Shannon," ( I love it when I get called that) said Mr. Roberts, "My Private Part died today, and I am very sad."

Knowing how patients are forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, the only thing I could think to say was, "Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Roberts, please accept my condolences."

The following day, Mr. Roberts, was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out his pajamas, when I met up with him during my med pass.

"Mr. Roberts," I said, "You shouldn't be walking down the hall like that. Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas."

"But, Nurse Shannon!," replied Mr. Roberts, "I told you yesterday that my Private Part died."

"Yes, you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?"

(Make sure you're sitting down, you're gonna love this!!!!)

"Well," he replied, "Today's the viewing."

What do I do? ~Update 2~

2006-05-18T02:08:00.000-05:00

Well, it's been 2 weeks now since I sent out the note to my friend.

One good thing I can say is that it wasn't returned.

The bad thing....

I've lost a friend.

I suppose I knew this all along, before I sent the note, I was able to deal with the loss. I think my thoughts at the time on it were "what could it hurt to send out a note to try and rekindle that friendship"....now my thoughts are "Why?" & "What?".

Why couldn't I leave well enough alone?
Why did it end the way it did?
What did I do wrong?
What could I have done differently?
What happened.

Prior to all this, these questions were at the back of my mind, but I could live with them there, now they're at the fore front and leave me to ponder how things went, reviewing that friendship and seeing where I could have been a better friend. Making sure that any errors I made in that friendship with him, I don't dare repeat in other friendships with my current friends.

I'd just like to take this time to say, thank you one and all for your advice in this matter. For those of you who thought it wasn't a good idea.....you're right, it probably wasn't. But I just had to know one way or another. For those of you who think that he's a knob for being such a putz...lol...thank you as well.

I've always said, God puts you where you need to be. I've just been shown that you've been put here to show me what true friendship means.

For that, I thank you.

What do I do? ~Update 1~

2006-05-05T08:10:00.000-05:00

I've listened to a lot of my friends give their say and I've taken it all into consideration. Some of the advice I've been given you'll find in the comments section of the previous post. Thanks to one an all that posted, thanks to those who I talked to about it. All of you have been generous with your time in this matter.

While I agree with the advice of letting it go because he has, I'm half irish and half scot, which to anyone who knows me means..........I'm too freakin stubborn to let it go....well...to a point.

While spending a few bucks to find out if it's him or not is probably wise, no one ever accused me of being that, lol.

I also agree that sending flowers is a bit over the top for trying to reestablishing a tentative connection.

I agree that while direct confrontation is not exactly what I had in mind (I'm not looking to pick a fight, I just want to say hi to someone I miss), going and knocking on his door probably isn't a keen idea either. Yanno, trespassing and "How the hell did you find me" questions would abound (as if they won't to begin with). So as an option, I'm thinking that one is out.

What I did decide to do was...

Write a note, I kept it light. Neutral and nothing accusatory. I said in the note that I'd love to hear from him, that would be great if I did, however if I didn't I would understand that too. I didn't get too personal in the note just in case it wasn't him (which I am about like Ivory on this one....99.97% sure...erm I mean pure), and if it happened that the public records I came across are in fact his but maybe a renter lives in the house, they could pass it along......or not.

I decided that I had to at least give it a try. I put the card in the mail with no expectations. I think the satisfaction of at least trying at this point is enough. If I hear from him then great, if I don't, well that's okay too.

In any case, no one can't say that I've not tried. I'll let you know what happens from here. Thanks for all your input and editorial comments.

*chuckling still at ass potato*

What do I do?

2006-05-04T02:35:00.000-05:00

I need your advise out there.

There is a friend, a very dear friend, who after 20 + years of friendship, stopped returning my calls. He'd met his partner and they'd settled blissfully into coupledom as your best mates are apt to do. I'd call and leave messages, yet it seemed that he never got them. Then one day I called and the number had been disconnected.

Let me just say at this point, that this is not just any old friend. This was a person with whom I grew up, partied and played with, when it came time for me to get married, he even gave me away. After a time I chalked it up to another friendship lost. I've not gone anywhere in the time we've been apart. Granted I've grown emotionally and spiritually in that time, not to mention I've made huge life changes. Prior, when we were close, I shared all that with him.

He was like a brother to me.

He's been on my mind off and on quite a bit lately. I've been wondering how exactly I go about trying to find him. Finally it struck me at 3:15 a.m. (yes I'd been tossing and turning unable to sleep for a while) how I might be able to find him if he was still living in my area. I lept out of bed, dashed to my computer and lo and behold, I think I found him.

Now what? There's no phone number listing, only his address. I can't even be sure it's him due to the fact that his name is rather generic and I don't remember his partners' name. Then that leads me to my next dilema, if he stopped all contact with me, should I try to contact him, will I get rebuffed?

I'd thought of sending a note, ask any of my friends, I'm good for sending a card or a note just because. I'd thought of sending him flowers, just because I can. Yet I find myself wondering why it is he broke off contact and would my efforts just be ignored?

What's your thoughts? What should I do? Should I attempt contact or just let it go? I'm not looking for the why's of what caused our friendship to lapse. I just want my friend back. I miss him and he doesn't even know it.

Leave a comment and help me out here. Don't worry I'll keep you up to date at to how and/or what it is I decide to do and what the end result ends up being. I'd also like to hear from the lurkers too (you know who you are), everyone's opinion means alot to me on this one.

How do you say "Oh $hit" in french?

2006-05-02T13:47:00.000-05:00

I'm trying to get things sorted for my best friends' wedding. Yanno making reservations and the like.

She recommended one place, so I call, luckily the front desk lady is bilingual. Great! No problem! We talk and have a nice chat. However she's limited in what she has available. Ok, I can deal with that, except for the fact that the room we need (and the one she has available) will not accomodate our party.

Shit.

So now I'm calling to make reservations for the night of the wedding, having gotten discouraged by my previous call, I decided to jump ahead and try to get a handle on at least that night of the two night event. I was fully expecting to stumble and mumble over what little french I do have at my disposal. That being my biggest concern really of this whole thing. Well lo and behold, they speak english too!! Woohoo! I get those arrangements made.

Now I'm back to square one. The first night of our stay. I'm trying to keep things cost effective for all involved, so I call Monette and we start to brain storm. She finds a place near her house that meets our needs, double beds (big enough) and in the right price range (cheap enough), so I call to make the reservation.

{insert the sound of squealing tires and slamming breaks}

This old lady answers the phone in an old french accent. She sounds so old that if she farted she'd fart croissant dust! As fast as she's rattling on, I grasp very quickly and accurately, she's in the hospitality industry and is only solo-lingual.

I. am. screwed.

I asked if she spoke english, no was her reply. Does she have anyone there that does? No again. Then she proceeds to rattle off to me that some other hotel nearby does have bilingual staff. Well that does me a fat lot of good now don't it? I thank her and proceed to call Monette in a panic. "Will you please call this dusty old lady?".......Monette laughing agrees.

"My girlfriend called and doesn't speak a word of french" Monette tells the lady.....the lady in reply tells Monette, "I don't speak a word of english!"....I correct Monette that I speak a word, even two or three of french.

I just don't speak it well!

Long story short, I got the hotels booked and sorted and pretty much everything taken care of. Now all we gotta do is get there and get that girl married before her soon to be finds out what he's gotten himself into and starts packing!

lol, with friends (and her sisters) like me, she doesn't stand a chance at sanity!

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2006-05-01T12:37:00.000-05:00

As You Slide Down The Banister Of Life, Remember.........

1. Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It's called "Ministers Do More Than Lay People." *snicker*

2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink and be Mary. or RuPaul...damn, looks good as both a man AND a woman!

3. The difference between the Pope and your boss...the Pope only expects you to kiss his ring. While your boss wants you to kiss his...

4. My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it is gone. *POOF*

5. The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom. That's the god's honest truth!

6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. The seat folded up, the drink spilled and that ice, well, it really chilled the mood. Yeah but I had popcorn stuck in places to be saved for later!

7. It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too. Thank you eBay!

8. A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house. I'm lucky, I can't say that.

9. My next house will have no kitchen - just vending machines and a large trash can. No muss, no fuss! Can't beat that with a stick!!

10. A blonde said, "I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off. I was relieved when he told me all I needed was turn signal fluid." I just can't fight that logic

11. I'm so depressed. My doctor refused to write me a prescription for Viagra. He said it would be like putting a new flagpole on a condemned building. Or in my case IN a condemned building

12. My neighbor was bit by a stray rabid dog. I went to see how he was and found him writing frantically on a piece of paper. I told him rabies could be treated, and he didn't have to worry about a Will. He said, "Will? What Will? I'm making a list of the people I want to bite." Can I add a few to that list?

13 Definition of a teenager? God's punishment for enjoying sex. From what I hear, that's not far from the truth

14. As we slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way. Amen!!

The store, it has been found!

2006-04-29T06:51:00.000-05:00

Thanks to my friend Moonie, we now know where to go to make that much needed purchase!

Just a thought...

2006-04-27T14:17:00.000-05:00

Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like...You know, sometimes I forget to eat!...Now...I've forgotten my address, how to spell my name properly, my mother's maiden name, my keys even. But I have never forgotten to eat........Really, you have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat!!

Just a thought.

Bored? Need to kill a few minutes?

2006-04-21T07:24:00.000-05:00

Go here and take this quiz (it'll take all of 3 minutes), leave your results in the comments section.

Has anyone else noticed...

2006-04-19T10:21:00.000-05:00

How it is that celebrities make a basic biological function and something that women have been doing since the dawn of man, look like a full out production to include hair, wardrobe and makeup?

Yesterday, TomKat had their baby girl. I've heard along the way that the former Mrs. Cruise (whom I like much better now that she is sans Tom) is pregnant. Leaves one to wonder doesn't it? When those two were married, they each were blaming the other for the lack of conception, yet the minute they split up, they BOTH end up pregnant.......I find that to be interesting...makes you wonder, who actually used infertility treatments?........But I should hush up because if TomKat were to find my blog of my own opinion, well, we just can't have that, I might get sued! This coming from the man who is coo-coo for coco puffs. To think I had a crush on that nut when I was a teen. Glad I got over it!

So right now I'm seeing a slew of celebrities who are pregnant.....Gwen Stefani (thank god! Now I'll love to see what a baby and gravity do to those abs!!....Not that I'm bitter mind ya, just flat out evil) Gwenyth just had her baby (more on that in a minute), Angelina Jolie...(my celebrity crush) is about to explode any minute, Brittany Spears........should have invested in that birth control that they put in your arm that lasts 5 years......no need for more white trash to be spilling forth their seed (Not to mention "K-Fed" is a waste of human flesh who does nothing more than make his way on his wifes' name....There is no accounting for taste is there Brit?) ! I could go on with a running commentary but I won't.

Although I have a final thought on celebrities and their kids.

The names they give them!! I'm sorry folks, but most of these people won't be celebrities when their kids are grown and having kids of their own. Why in the hell would Gwenyth Paltrow name her kid Apple!??! Does she own stock in the company!??! Then to turn around and name Paltrow number 2 MOSES?!?! Is she expecting him to part the Red Sea!? TomKat name their evil spawn Suri??? I'm thinking that there are a few letters missing from there.

Now don't get me wrong, I believe that everyone should be unique and individual. However when you are purposefully opening your kid up to public ridcule because they have a jacked up name....all I can say is DON'T!!! Kids are cruel enough as it is. Doesn't matter what economic background they come from, kids are kids and will torment other kids just because they can and nothing we as grown ups can do about that one fact.

These are just random rantings/thoughts bouncing off my skull.

Now I'm exhausted.

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2006-04-17T15:12:00.000-05:00

A well loved and respected cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral. The funeral was attended by collegues and family and friends alike, everyone from all walks of life. A huge heart covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service.

Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed sealing the doctor inside the beautiful heart forever. At that point, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When all eyes turned to stare at the him, he explained, "I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral...I'm a gynecologist."

That's when the proctologist fainted.

Last night was my first ever...

2006-04-15T16:07:00.000-05:00

Night on the floor as a nurse.

I've realized that I have found what I'm meant to do, which is be a nurse. Every person who travels a similar path as what I've traveled always has seconds thoughts, self doubt and a pile of insecurities as to whether or not what they are doing is truly the "right" thing.

I can say with certain conviction, this is MY right thing.

Couple of things to chuckle at...

1.) I'm finally at the station that I'll be training at for the night. I'm trying to sort out what it is I should do till my trainer shows up. A family member comes up to me and asks "Are you the nurse?", to which my reply was nothing more than a blank stare. Then it hit me, that she was talking to me and that yes, I was the nurse!

2.) While doing a dressing change, bent over a resident, I hear her muttering. I really don't think much of it as it's not very coherant. Then she begins playing with my hair and what she's saying becomes abundently clear...."Such pretty red hair." As I did her dressing change, I let her stroke my hair. I figured, it's easier to let her do that and keep her hands out of what it was I was trying to do than the alternative.

Yeah....this is going to be a good thing.

I have never...

2006-04-09T10:32:00.000-05:00

Walked out on a movie before that I can recall. And if I have, it's been so long ago, that I could honestly say it's been more than 20 years.

Since this is my last weekend of "freedom" as from here on out I'll be working solely the weekend (with the odd exception or two) decided to take advantage of the situation and go and play. Went to see a few movies that I'd been wanting to. Went and replaced a few toys that needed replacing, did some shopping, etc. You get the idea.

First we went to see Brokeback Mountain. I realize that it's about gay cowboys...which I'm open minded enough that, that in and of itself, didn't bother me. Past few days I'd considered buying the DVD because it just came out. I'm a movie buff, one of my things I'd like to accomplish is to have (where possible) as many as possible Oscar winning movies in my collection. The thought behind that is....you don't get to win an Oscar by having a crap movie. So then with that line of thinking in mind.......HOW in the HELL did this movie get nominated, let alone WIN Oscars?!?! Both the leads are wonderful actors, nice to look at, the supporting cast was people who I was glad to see working in a major film. Yet...I can't help but think...this movie SUCKS and man am I glad I didn't buy the DVD and only spent a buck to get in! I never felt sympathetic (nor was I made to feel that way) towards the characters, the pace was slower than molasses in January and it didn't seem to be going anywhere. When I realized that I was glad I didn't spend the money on the DVD, we decided to take off. There was maybe another 20 or so minutes left......I did keep thinking about the movie after leaving, but just to think...Holy hell! I've never left a movie before!.....so now I'm curious as to how it ended. I guess it'll be one of those that I'll wait to catch the end of when it's playing on HBO.

So with that disappointment fresh in my mouth, it was with some caution that I went back to see Nanny McPhee. WOW!!! Talk about a complete 180!!! Yes it is a kids' movie. However, it has life lessons that even as adults we can use frequent reminders of. Besides, I love Colin Firth, Emma Thompson and a slew of others that were in the movie.

So all in all, it was Nanny McPhee by a landslide for entertainment and Brokeback Mountain....not so much. The weekend thus far has been a good one. Just going to spend the rest of my Sunday tutoring a mate who is also in nursing school and goofing off as much as possible!

A funny thing happened on the way through the checkout...

2006-04-07T21:53:00.000-05:00

I got the job! It's official. Went and took the drug screening and everything.

Was informed of the dress code and what was expected of me in the way of my uniform as opposed to others on staff. Dietary has one color scheme, Laundry another, Nursing Assistants another and the Nurses yet another.

As I was checking out with my purchase at a local chain retailer, the cashier looks at my purchase and says......"You a nurse?".....At first I was going to give him "a look" and a smartass answer, then it hit me, I was finally able to say with pride......"Yeah, I am the nurse!"

Still some days it's a surprise and a mystery.

WooHoo!!!

2006-04-04T16:39:00.000-05:00

First things first, it's not official just yet (they have to go through the motions of calling and offering me the job), however, this time next week I'll be a full fledged working nurse!! I GOT A JOB!!

So to celebrate and to protect Fran from the horror that is a day spent with me shopping, I decided to take my mom with me to get a dress for Moonie's wedding. I didn't get as lucky as her, she only went to one store and tried on one dress and knew with that one dress that it was "the one", although much to her credit she tried on a couple of others, yet went back to the first one. No, I didn't get that lucky. To make a long story short, it was the 3rd store, 1st dress I tried on. Shoes, that was another matter, yet I found some that I think will be great. Best part? Spent next to nothing on all of it......dress, shoes and special hoist and round-em-up bra!!! Can I get a bargin and look good or what?

With this being such a special event for one of my bestestestestest friends in the whole wide world, I thought showing up in jeans and trainers would be in poor taste. I think Moonie would agree lol.

So now all we gotta do is hang out till June, then it's PARTY TIME!!!

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2006-04-03T07:18:00.000-05:00

Did you remember??

2006-04-02T11:11:00.000-05:00

To set your clocks forward an hour?.....blech.....I hate changing the clocks. What a pain. Especially for someone like me who has a collection of wristwatches, by the time I get them all switched over to DST, I'll have to change them back.........bugger.

Just in case you can never remember how it goes, a little something I learned a long time ago (which some of you may or may not have been taught) was "Spring forward, Fall back". If you aren't sure which way your clocks go, use that little memory trick. It always seems to help me.

At least we're now caught up with Europe. This past week we've been an additional hour behind them. My friend Limpy who lives in London and at the global time line (Greenwich Mean Time) have switched over their clocks last Saturday. Which for this week is always rather confusing. Ironically in the fall when we switch the clocks back to regular time, we (North America and Europe) do it at the same time. Here we call our time change Daylight Savings Time (DST), where over in England it's called, British Summer Time (BST). Same thing only different I suppose eh?

Go figure.

To learn more about Daylight Savings Time and how it came to be, click here.

I can live with that...

2006-03-31T09:53:00.000-05:00

Which Boondock Saint's Character Do You Honor?

Connor MacManus - You make a strong case for being the first born. You're tough and can get in your wits when you need to in verbal arguments. You know how to end a bar fight in style, but your one flaw is trying to act like Murphy and do gutsy insane things without thinking.

I found out this weekend that Easter is coming...

2006-03-28T21:58:00.000-05:00

This past weekend I went down to a small town just south of Atlanta to see a dear friend. It was great to finally get there, after what should have been a 10 hour and 8 minute drive (according to Yahell! Maps) it ended up being a 13 hour (or there abouts) drive, I damn near dropped to my knees to kiss the ground. To come home again that same drive was 11 1/2 hours.

Going around the Atlanta outerbelt was a parking lot. The saving grace in all of it was that I was constantly moving. Granted, it was 2 inches an hour, but still.....I was moving! While all about me newer fancier cars were pulling over due to over heating, my trusty little convertible kept it's cool and kept me going.....THANK GOD!

So when I finally got off my knees, we went to get something to eat and I taught the cutest 9 year old boy I know how to eat with chopsticks. He's obsessed. Sorry about that Jen ......*chuckling* he did good for a first start, but the more he played with them the more he forgot how to hold them. lol, So to get even, Jen decided that later on in the weekend that Hercules and Zeus needed to be evicted (albeit temporarily) to have their home cleaned.......oh yeah.......I should introduce you to the cute kid and Hercules.......

Yeah I was reminded......I can walk on my ass cheeks. Ain't he cute? The kid, not the reptile.....lol That kid I tell ya knows he's a doll, point a camera in his direction and he's ready to perform for you....example......

We went to a cherry blossom festival in the area. It was really cool and very nice. They had tigers and had several different shows. We didn't get to see the shows, however we did get to watch some training and watch them "play".

While the cutest kid ever and his mom rode rides, I hung out and took pics. I don't do really well on the sort of rides they have at these festivals. While taking pics, I spotted this woman, who I think is completely beautiful. Then she turned around. I nearly spat out my soda and it damn near was coming out my nose for her efforts!

I had to let her know how much I enjoyed her hair and compliment her on her obvious sense of humor.

On Sunday, we took a short roadtrip to a nearby town that some of you may recognize....

If you've seen the movie Fried Green Tomatoes, then you should recognize the Whistle Stop Cafe. Literally what you see is what is there. As Jen refers to it "it's a wide spot in the road"......literally, there's not much more to it. It was great to visit there, to see where a beloved movie was filmed. We spoke to a few locals and had a nice time.......well I know I did, I think Jen just thought I was nuts lol.

Speaking of nuts......it seemed that it was raining boiled peanuts........yeah you heard me right........boiled peanuts. I had that "huh?" look and made that sound on Saturday night when we were leaving the festival. Jen all of a sudden got super excited and started saying what I heard to be something about boiled penis's. I was speechless......I'm like "HUH?!?".......finally I got her to turn and look at me (I guess there are times when I can't hear properly and have to read lips).....it's a regional thing there in Georgia. I'd never heard of it till Saturday night. Then when we were on our little road trip we stopped to get something to drink and there was a crockpot cooking of boiled peanuts.......then when we were outside of the Whistle Stop Cafe, there was a fella with a huge pot of them he stopped us and asked us if we wanted to try them. Given that I at one time let Moonie bully me into eatting frogs legs, I figured a boiled peanut wouldn't hurt.......it wasn't to terrible. To be honest, Jen made some on Sunday that were nice and salty and I thought they tasted better. However, to be fair to the guy that offered up the peanuts, I had a huge wad of chewing gum in my mouth and refused to spit it out (I thought that would have been disrespectful if I spat it out) so I tucked the gum into my cheek and ate the peanut. Smooshie is the best way to describe the texture, the flavor (like I said, Jen's was better) was, well.....it tasted like chicken......lol sorry couldn't resist.....it tasted just like a peanut. I couldn't resist but to turn to Jen and ask, "So this is what you've been going on about?"...I think she had to resist the urge to smack me in the forehead for that comment. So to quote Jen "It was raining boiled peanuts" this past weekend.

I think to be honest........the best part of the trip was staying up late and laughing till our sides hurt and we (erm...I should say "I") fell asleep.

Thanks Jen, I had a wonderful time.

Approved = I passed!!!!!!!!!

2006-03-22T11:09:00.000-05:00

Pending...

2006-03-22T08:54:00.000-05:00

4 entries found for pending.

pend·ing Audio pronunciation of "pending" ( P ) Pronunciation Key (pndng)
adj.

1. Not yet decided or settled; awaiting conclusion or confirmation.
2. Impending; imminent.

prep.

1. While in the process of; during.
2. While awaiting; until.

[French pendant, pendant, pending (from Old French. See pendant1) + -ing1.]

Source: The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
Copyright © 2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company.
Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

Main Entry: pend·ing
Pronunciation: 'pen-di[ng]
Function: preposition
1 : during the time of
2 : while awaiting : in the time preceding

Source: Merriam-Webster's Dictionary of Law, © 1996 Merriam-Webster, Inc.

Main Entry: pending
Function: adjective
1 : not yet decided
2 : to occur or be realized soon

Source: Merriam-Webster's Dictionary of Law, © 1996 Merriam-Webster, Inc.

pending

adj : awaiting conclusion or confirmation; "business still pending"

Source: WordNet ® 2.0, © 2003 Princeton University

................................I don't see pending listed as a verb...........Pending, meaning to torture the ever loving daylights out of those that are left waiting with a pending status......*click* .........56,003

Never has one word been hated so much by so few

How many times...

2006-03-21T12:28:00.000-05:00

Does one person have to hit the "refresh" button in order to finally get the results they are seeking?

Yes, I took my test today and before you ask............I dunno.

It felt okay.....meaning I think I did okay.

It's just that....I just dunno how I did.

Right now it's a wait and see sort of game. I can get my unofficial results as soon as...*looks at watch* right now up till Thursday. I'll be getting my official results in about 2 or 3 weeks.

*click*...........190

*click*............191

*click*.............192

Arrrrrrrggggggggggg

Getting close...

2006-03-19T21:13:00.000-05:00

To testing day.

Yeah I know I told you a couple of weeks ago that I'd be testing this past Thursday. Well, thing is, a week ago, I was sick. Not a normal type of sick like "sick as a dog" sick......more like......"I think I'm turning into my mother "THE BLOB" kind of sick". Went grocery shopping....a normal trip that takes maybe 45 minutes tops, took me close to an hour and a half with two sit down breaks. I had absolutely no energy or capability to move. So I took the day off from studying. I decided to reschedule my testing date to this coming Tuesday.

I think I'm about as ready as I'm ever going to be. No, I don't know all I feel I should know for this test. I don't think I ever will. I'm scared/nervous/anxious to get it done. At the same time, I'm excited. I did a bit of research and hopefully by Wednesday or Thursday (at the latest) I should know how I did.

The goal is success. However, if I'm unsuccessful, that's okay too. I'll keep studying and reschedule and take it again. But I'm feeling like that won't happen. I've always believed that God has called me to be a nurse. I felt that way 11 years ago when I started out on this path. I firmly believe that God puts you where you need to be when you need to be there. So it took me a while to get to this point. I've studied as much as my head will allow. I've done (at this point) all I can.

The rest is in his hands.

Say a prayer if you don't mind.

....................For those of you who don't pray....do that thing that you do to whomever you do it to. Bark at the moon, bite the heads off of chickens, whatever it takes to help this chick along, I'd be grateful for!

Happy Birthday & Wish Me Luck!

2006-03-04T22:41:00.000-05:00

Tooo Youuuuuuuuu
Tooo Youuuuuuuuu
Dear oonieeeeeeeee
Tooo Youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

And just to let you know...

I caught Chris working on a Happy Birthday nekkid dance just for you, but it was so hot and steamy that my camera melted.....sooooooo......I tried to recreate it to the best of my ability.......hope you like it.....click here to see "The Man" in action!

Happy Birthday girlfriend, I love ya and wish I was there to help celebrate your birthday properly with ya.

With new business done, onto old business...

I'm going to be gone for a while, I got my ATT (Authorization To Test)finally!! (woohoo) My scheduled test date is March 16th @ 9:00 a.m..

I'll be back most likely the 18th because St. Paddy's day is the day after my exam and I plan on celebrating like the proper irish lass that I am.....that's to say that most likely my next post will be written with a raging hangover!

Keep me in your prayers and wish me luck!

"You may be getting a medal?!?!"

2006-03-03T12:48:00.000-05:00

"Are they going to give you a chest to pin it onto as well?"

My mother got out of the Army back in '63, she got married and pregnant (we assume in that order, but this is my mother after all so it's hard to tell) and so was promptly honorably discharged. After all, this was back in the day when women were thought to not be able to both server her country and her family at the same time.

Today she went with a nice (yet, albeit, talkative) volunteer who is helping her get things sorted so that she can take full advantage of her veteran status. Read that to mean she'll finally get some Belltones to turn off when she wants to ignore me.

Apparently as it was brought up today, since the cold war ended, anyone serving in the US military during the cold war, are entitled to a medal. Regardless of the capacity to serve in the military. So this story ends where it began....

If they give her a medal, are they going to give her a chest to pin it onto? If so, where do I sign up to serve?

Thought this was kind of cool given the topic...yeah she looks like she needs a medal or two on that uniform.

Some things you just can't help but laugh at...

2006-03-02T19:32:00.000-05:00

Tonight after dinner, I made mention of the fact that I'd love to have some ice cream. The following conversation ensues between me, that guy that lives with me and the crazy old lady...

Me: "I'm thinking I'd love to have some ice cream."
TGTLWM: *pouting*

At this point I think he thought I wanted him to go to the store to get some.....he wasn't far off, just wanted him to go with me.

COL: "Well there's some out there frozen."
Me: *creased up with laughter* (All I could think was....well YEAH.....DUH! Isn't all ice cream frozen??)
TGTLWM: "What? Huh?!" (he was watching a commercial and missed what the COL had said)
Me: *gasping* "It's not you it's what she said..."
TGTLWM: *perplexed look on his face*

I then repeated what the COL had said.

COL: "Well, yanno what I meant, it has frost bite!"
TGTLWM: *laughing*
COL: *stammering* "Yanno what I mean!!!"
Me: "No, no I don't "know" what you mean, but I think I have a clue as to what you were trying to say."

At which point I've got tears in my eyes and the COL is damn near stomping her foot.

TGTLWM: "Do you mean freezer burn?" *trying to recompose himself*
COL: "YEAH! Ya knew what I meant!"

Both TGTLWM and I are laughing so hard we're crying.

COL: "Whatever!"

I'm thinking she wasn't very well amused.

God knows that I was however! Now while you are trying to stop laughing, go vote!

Gulps Oh my, what have I gotten myself into?!

2006-03-02T13:30:00.000-05:00

Well, on a lark, I decided to send in my photo and a "bio" .....lol I have no idea how to write those damned things! Soooooo if ya'll don't go vote for me, I'm screwed!

So help a ginger-haired soon to be nurse out and go vote!

While you're there, stick around and check out some of the others, all the women in my opinion are tops and just absolute jems. Madman ain't bad neither ;)

Big hugs and thanks for playin along!

What number are you?

2006-02-26T12:55:00.000-05:00

You Are the Individualist

4

You are sensitive and intuitive, with others and yourself.

You are creative and dreamy... plus dramatic and unpredictable.

You're emotionally honest, real, and easily hurt.

Totally expressive, others always know exactly how you feel.

Be careful who you start up with........you may regret it...

2006-02-24T15:08:00.000-05:00

I can't wait to become a crazy old lady!!!

2006-02-24T10:50:00.000-05:00

All ya gotta do to see the clip and why I can't wait to be a crazy old lady is take your cursor and click on the "play" button. (...yanno the one that looks like |> that)

It's spring isn't it?

2006-02-23T13:01:00.000-05:00

If ya cast ya mind back and remember what it was that Romeo looked like with his snow cone on....

You'll recall, it was rather difficult to take him seriously as the alpha male. Nothing had changed mind you. He was STILL the alpha male, just no one took him seriously. He got his feelings hurt because, I'm sure, the other cats laughed at him and mocked him. Kind of like Rudolph and not being included in any reighndeer games.

Well the snow cone is off and he's back to his usual self. As well, as the weather turns towards spring, other cat owners are letting out their female cats, because the owners have not bothered to take responsibility for their girls and get them fixed. So I'm sure the yelling and screaming that they are doing is enough to make anyone go nuts. The hussies keep circling our house like vultures. All four of the boys (as we call our cats) go from window to window because dammit there is another cat on their property. They don't care that it's a girl (I think they are all gay, but ya never know, I could be wrong), all they know is it's another cat and they need to kick some kitty butt and get this rouge feline out of their line of sight.

There is this one female, however. She's a brazen hussy I tell ya. Back when Romeo had the collar on, she sat on the back step at the back door and catterwalled like you wouldn't believe. I seriously think this was her way of asking the boys to come out and play, however, I don't know feline-ese. I went to go outside and there she was, just carrying on, Romeo comes up and looks at her. Meows and carries on and tries to scare her off. This is when I knew he wasn't being taken seriously with that snow cone on.......she just sat there and watched him get uptight and bounce off the screen because the snow cone acted as a natural buffer to keep him from getting to close.

So then fast forward to the day before yesterday...

Finally no snow cone!

The hussy is back, yelling and carrying on louder than before. I opened the door to see which one of the half dozen hussies it was and it was in fact the one from earlier that sat and watched Romeo carry on and get frustrated. Yanno if I'm not mistaken.....I think she was laughing at him too. Well she quickly stopped laughing this day because Romeo charged up the steps, dashed across the expanse of floor only to tackle the screen and hiss very loudly and proclaim his territory. She legged it out of the area as fast as only fear and her little legs could carry her.

I closed the door amused to see Romeo strut off with his tail in the air as if to say, "Yeah, I still got it!".

Romeo, my hero! He's fearsome no?

Did you know...

2006-02-22T10:51:00.000-05:00

That 9 out of 10 cannibals agree that people with tattoo's taste better?

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2006-02-20T10:49:00.000-05:00

I stumbled across these pics while looking at the news in England. One of my best friends and his cause is being heard finally today. Thank god! More on that later.

So while going through the news, there was a section of photos......yanno the sort......."I bet this person wishes that the camera was never invented" sort of photo. At the time I saw the pics there were only 7 (I'm suprised by that considering they were all pics of politicians!). Yes ladies and gentlemen, our "fearless" leader (lemme give you a towel so you can clean up that dripping sarcasm) had not just one but TWO of the seven pics. That's a percentage rate of......what?.... 29%? Kinda scary if you ask me.

I don't remember which site they came from.......Sky, BBC, Channel 4....one of those 3 and I believe the photo credit just said Reuters.......never let it be said that I don't give credit where credit is due.

Now onto the good stuff now that I got the rest of that out of the way....

OOOooo.....It's scary in there, I fink I'll just stay out here in the hallway.

There is not a caption that I could provide that would make this any funnier and not insulting Laura.

Now what?

2006-02-19T19:56:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry that I've not been about like I thought I would be, what with school being over and all. I guess I've just not felt inspired to do much of anything, with all my motivation to procrastinate gone. Right now I've gotten all my paperwork sent in to the state boards so that I can get a testing date. Hopefully I'll get that letter sometime this week. Then I sweat! I've not been much able to get into the groove of studying for the NCLEX considering that I don't know when I'll be taking it. I know me though, once I have a date (I'm gonna try and schedule it within a reasonable amount of time) I know I'll go into panic mode and start studying my butt off. I guess till then I should relax and enjoy the time I do have.

But I can't.

My neurosis is working overtime. I'm scared to death that I may have not made the right choice in going back to school and half thought of looking into going back into banking. Then I got the verbal bitch slap I needed from that guy that lives with me. The voice of reason booming at me "BUT YOU HATED BANKING!!!" .......Well, yeah, I did. But I knew what I was doing! I had a grip on things. I'm scared shitless that I'm gonna pass my boards, get a job and then on the first day stare blankly at my DON (Director of Nursing...The boss) and say "Uhhh...Now what?" It would be just my luck that she would accuse me of being a nurse and that I should go and do that nursing thing that I'm supposed to be able to do.

"But how?".....Right now I guess with this time off, I've had too much time on my hands and too many crazy thoughts zig-zagging their way across the neural pathways that make up what is left of my mind. Yanno, that swiss-cheese-tapioca-pudding-consistency-mush that's between my ears and behind my eyes (where my mind has been mistaken in believing that it can hide successfully)....I just wonder.....am I doing what I'm supposed to be doing?

Right now, I dunno, I guess only time will tell.

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2006-02-12T21:32:00.000-05:00

OOOOOOOooooooo Shoessssssssssssss *drool* *slobber* *drool*

A young blonde on vacation and driving through the Everglades wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes, but was reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.

After becoming very frustrated with the no-haggle-on-prices attitude of one of the shopkeepers, she shouted, "Then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator, so I can get a pair of shoes for free!" The shopkeeper said with a sly, knowing smile, "Little lady, just go and give it a try!"

So she headed out toward the swamps, determined to catch an alligator.

Later in the day, as the shopkeeper was driving home, he pulled over to the side of the levee where he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the murky bayou water, shotgun in hand.

Just then, he spotted a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning speed, she took aim, killed the creature and hauled it onto the slimy bank of the swamp. Lying nearby were 7 more of the dead creatures, all lying on their backs.

The shopkeeper stood on the bank, watching in silent amazement as the blonde struggled and flipped the gator onto its back. Rolling her eyes heavenward and screaming in frustration, she shouted,

"SHIT ... THIS ONE'S BAREFOOT, TOO!"

I got by with a little help from my friends...

2006-02-10T23:52:00.000-05:00

If it wasn't for my friends I don't think I would have survived nursing school...with or without the little sanity I have left. Thanks to them however, they made the hell worth it.

Case in point...

One of my best friends would text message me......wait, I'll let her explain it in her own words. All I gotta say is that I got all 2000 questions done and turned in, now I'm waiting for my confirmation that I can go and take my NCLEX. And if it weren't for the likes of people like Moonie, it would have certainly been a road traveled with a lot less color in it.

I am still continually amazed at all of the support that I've been shown by everyone. Thank you, one and all. Click Here for a much deserved thank you.

Where in the hell did this come from?!?!

2006-02-07T11:40:00.000-05:00

Doing the dishes, putting things away, I stopped dead in my tracks.

As I was putting the milk into the fridge, there it was, right in front of me.

How long it had been there I don't know. I didn't even know it exsisted.

All I can say is that I'm thankful that it's turned up.

The only picture that I know of in exsistence of me and my parents together back when they were married.

No chicken leg jokes please! The older girl in the photo is of my cousin who was 18 months older than me. My only regret is that it is as blurry as it is :(

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2006-02-06T10:45:00.000-05:00

Lawyers should never ask a Southern grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer!

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmother, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?" She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him."

The defense attorney almost died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you bastards asks her if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry asses in jail for contempt."

Here's to hoping your week is better than their day in court! Have a good one!

The big day finally arrived!!!

2006-02-03T22:47:00.000-05:00

During the ceremony, you could tell who was happy to be graduating, who had a shit attitude and who really didn't have a clue!

Getting my special, "I made it to the end in one piece pin!!"

I gave a speech about Florence Nightingale and how she changed nursing forever.

Got my stuff, let's get outta here before they get wise to me!

It's done and all over....WoooooHoooooooooo!!!

FAQ's...

2006-02-01T18:48:00.000-05:00

1. So do you know where you are going to be working?
No. I'm not licensed, without my license, I can't work. Yet.

2. What kind of nursing do you want to do?
I dunno just yet. Mental health is looking promising, but I think that is due primarily to my first hand experience.

3. What is the deal with these 2000 questions?
I took a mock test of the actual test I will be taking in order to be licensed. According to my score, that detirmines how many questions that I had to do (ideally, before graduation), everyone had to do them. Some people had to do as few as a 1000. Others as many as 5000. I got away with...you guessed it...2000. Before you ask.....the class average was 3000 per student. I got lucky.

4. Why be an LPN (low paid nurse according to many) and not an RN (real nurse according to the same previous few that think that being an LPN isn't being a real nurse)?
I plan on being an RN, don't worry, one step at a time. Besides, being an LPN is still being a nurse, just a different kind of one. For those not in the know as to why the change...I was in banking, while I enjoyed working with the public, I hated the coporate atmosphere. I had started nursing school a number of years ago and after only a week in school, my Da died, with all of that baggage, I just couldn't do it all. Given enough time, you'll end up doing what it is you're meant to do. Just takes some time is all. So here I am about to graduate.

5. Romeo's butt ever get screwed back on?
Yes it did, thank you for asking. It's all healed, just leaving the snow cone on for entertainment value.

6. How's your mother doing?
It's my mother. 'Nuff said.

7. How long till you take your NCLEX?
I dunno yet, still gotta finish up my 2000 questions. I'm at ~~500~~ ~~600~~ ~~700~~ ~~900~~ (dunno what the hell happened to 800)1400 (Woohoo, only 600 to go!...I did several tests all at once to make that jump up) at the mo, so this is taking some time to get done. Woohoo!! I got all the questions done and turned in. Turns out that there was a conference and everyone was out of the office so all of our information did not get sent over to the school board when they originally promised it would be (the monday following grad)......so my stufff is going with everyone else. The beauty of it? It's as if I had turned it in at the deadline set....not 5 days later. Well that's the beauty of it for me at least, lol.

8. What sort of music do you listen to?
Right now I'm hooked on Marc Broussard. Thanks Toni ;)

9. Are you a true redhead?
Now ya just bein nosey.

10. Does the carpet match the drapes?
See the answer to number 9..........and yes, now leave it be.

11. Seems like there are alot of times where you aren't happy. Do you have the capacity to even be happy?
Well given my childhood and how I was raised, yeah, I've got issues. That does hang over my head quite a bit. Secretly I do carry expecations. I try not to expect people to live up to them however because if I did, not only would I be frequently sad (as you may have noticed) I'd also be profoundly disappointed. I try not to burden anyone else with my issues or problems. If however at any time my behaviour is such that I'm just a miserable cranky git.....you have my preapproval to smack the ever loving shit clean outta me. So to answer your question..."Can I be happy", I dunno, but I'm going to give it a try. Thankfully, I've finally learned that I'm the one that has to make me happy, should I rely on others, I never will be.

12. Now that you're a LPN (some would say "low paid nurse") when are you going to become an RN (others would say "real nurse")?
Well right now, I'm just going to work on getting my feet wet at this job, which I'm hoping won't take long. I'm looking at the fall as to when it is I'll be back in school taking classes to become a "Real Nurse".

13. So how's the new job coming along?
So far so good. At first it was all a bit overwhelming but as time progresses I'm finding my stride and happy with my progress.

14. Have you figured out what you're going to do about RN school?
Well, I've decided that I'm going to utilize the oft overlooked and underappreciated value of distance learning. What that means to some of the old timers...think correspondence school, for those fresh out of school, think online classes. Same difference basically. I found a great program and am happy with not only the RN program but the customer service that they provide as well. Once I'm back from Moonie's wedding I'll be throwing myself into it full force. With that being said, I should be an RN late next summer! Wish me luck!

15. What's this thing with you and spiders?
I cannot tolerate anything with either (1) more legs than my cat that moves on it's own steam or (2) with less legs than me that does the same. Needless to say, I squeal like a pig in a trough when I see either a spider or a snake. Call it a girlie thing. Tease me about it and I'll give a pinch that'll make your eyes water!

{What's up with the third degree? Someone writing a book?}

If you got any other questions you'd like answered, just lemme know.

WooFREAKINHooooooooo for me!

2006-01-25T14:31:00.000-05:00

The epitome of irony: Using your 5 year service pen that you received before leaving your job, to go to nursing school to fill out your graduation announcements for the education you received after leaving that place of employment.

Salem's cover has been blown...(for Toni)

2006-01-23T13:15:00.000-05:00

One of my dearest blogging buddies is feeling poorly and I'm hoping to cheer her up...

Toni is one of those people that I've met while being in the blogger world who has become a dear friend. I've never met her in person, only have gotten to know her through her writting and admire and respect her tremendously. She's a kajun, yanno, one of those sassy wenches that won't let a blow hard like Katrina get her down. She opened her heart and her home to those who were in need the most during Katrina (she lives not far from there) and was wonderful in keeping all of her faithful readers up to date when all weather hell broke loose. She made us worry for her safety, cry for her losses and encouraged us to get mad with her when the fallout came due to the poor response time of those who would try to assist in the aftermath of such hell.

I could never compare (nor would I want to) with someone like her. Either as a person or as a writer. However, I think I got her beat when it comes to twisted senses of humor. You see, she's also a professional writer with her first novel due to come out next year. I've already threatened her that when she takes her booksigning on tour, I'll be the first in line. She'll know who I am and that I am me because I'll be standing in line, but I won't be alone. Noooooo, I'll be standing in line waiting for her, along with me ever faithful sidekick, Salem.

Salem can now come out of hiding.

Everyone, meet Salem..........Salem........this is everyone.

Salem can now come out of hiding, because you see, his cover was blown. Yes, you heard correctly, his cover was blown. Sky News broke the story yesterday afternoon. Salem was working for the British government as an international spy. A rock of intrigue, a rock of mystery if you will. Always there, steadfast in his duty. Always in the background, no one ever taking notice. He worked around the world, however his favorite place, a place he fondly referred to as home was in Moscow. However, now, he's had to flee the country. Due to the pubilicty, he can no longer do the job he was meant to do. No longer can he lounge about, getting paid for doing nothing. Afterall, isn't that what intelligence work is about?........oooo I digress....

Anyways, Salem is now on his way home, to live with me upon my shelf until that time comes when he and I can finally go to that book signing and meet Ms. Toni in person.

............Hope you feel better soon hon, take care of you.

Just a little funny on a Monday....

2006-01-23T08:57:00.000-05:00

Poor Rome.......

We discovered yesterday after coming home from the hospital, that his bum is falling off. Yes you heard correctly. Twice. First thing yesterday morning mom is holding herself in the classic "I think I'm having a heart attack" way, so I call 9-1-1 and promptly jump in the shower. Hey just think.......all those firefighters and I'm already naked and wet.....erm.....nevermind, that's just my little fantasy. Anyways, I digress. We get mom over to the ER. I'm good, I'm handling things well, I've got all my stuff so I can study for my finals, I'm coping.

Come home and take a nap, start studying again, and wonder about where Romeo is because I've not really seen him all day. I go looking for him in all the usual spots.......to find blood where he usually sleeps (at the foot of my bed)...that's when I start to worry. Call for that guy that lives with me, he helps me to discover that Rome's bum is falling off. Hence the blood. Okay, it's official. I panic. We call the vet (wonderful lady btw) who tells us to meet her at the office in an hour. It's either we do that and pay $45 for the emergency call or take him to the kitty emergency room (I've already BEEN in one ER today, and quite frankly, ONE is enough!) which could cost several hundred dollars. Since he didn't seem "sick" and the blood wasn't gushing out everywhere.....we waited.

Then, I had a meltdown. I called my instructor that I was supposed to have a final with today. Hysterical. Sobbing. Completely non-comprehensible. Basically? Melting down over the phone. ooooo Gentle reader, let me just tell you, it wasn't pretty. Probably the first meltdown of it's kind that I've had in .....oooo, nearly a year. At least the first of it's kind since school started. By the grace of God, she understood what I was trying to say and told me to take care of things and I can make up the final later this week (God I love that woman!) and not to worry. So getting Rome to the vet, she looks, yep. Sure enough, his bum is falling off. No big deal she says, it usually happens in dogs, but it every so often happens with cats. Give him a shot, he takes some drugs, she says "You'll be amazed at how fast it heals". Okay, so then he's not going to die? Nahhhhh not today.

Phew.

Now it's time to laugh. Mom's getting the care she needs (it wasn't a heart attack...one friend suggested it was really bad gas) because we dunno what in the heck is wrong with her. Well other than the obvious, we dunno, so she's where she needs to be at the hospital getting the best care anywhere and Romeo is looking rather pathetic and pouting about his snow cone and bouncing off of everything. Now I know how new parents feel making their homes childproof. Try doing the same for a cat. Yeah, okay, now you see the humor in this. Thank you.

So I'll be carrying around my camera for more chances to get some really funny, yet pitiful shots of my little snow cone of furry love. I'm so glad he loves me. lol

Have a great day out there and go hug your kid!

Just a few little funnies on a Monday...

2006-01-16T10:56:00.000-05:00

A professor was giving a lecture on "Involuntary Muscular Contractions" to first year medical students. Realizing that this was not the most riveting subject the professor decided to lighten the mood slightly.

He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, "Do you know what your asshole is doing while you're having an orgasm?"

She replied, "He's probably drinking beer at the bar with his friends". {Ouch!}

------------------------------------

After 30 years delivering mail on the same route, a friendly mailman was going to retire, and all his customers were sad to see him go.

On his last day, the family at the first house on one block came out on the porch, gave him an envelope of vacation money and a bottle of Scotch. At the next house the people gave him a box of Havana cigars and wished him well.

The lady at the third house met him at the door in a flimsy negligee, and without saying a word, led him upstairs to the bedroom for a half-hour of passionate lovemaking, then downstairs to the kitchen, where she finished preparing a lavish breakfast of ham and eggs, buckwheat pancakes with maple syrup and a big pot of coffee. As she was refilling his cup, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the saucer. "This is all overwhelming," he said, "but what's the dollar for?"

"Well," she answered, "this morning I told my husband that you were retiring and asked him whether we should do something nice for you.

He said, 'Fuck him! Give him a dollar.' The breakfast was my own idea." {Such a considerate lady!}

------------------------------------

A cabbie picks up a Nun. She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring.

He replies: "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you" She answers, " My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive."

"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me."

She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic." The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and Catholic!"

"OK" the nun says. "Pull into the next alley."

The nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a hooker blush. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

"My dear child," said the nun, why are! you crying?"

"Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish."

The nun says, "That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party." {oo that's gonna leave a mark!}

Sorry for the inconvience as of late...

2006-01-14T08:24:00.000-05:00

I had wondered why some of my regular commentors hadn't been leaving comments and several friends said that they had posted but their comments weren't showing.

It's Blogger folks. It hates me. Yes I realize I'm not special and it hates everyone.

What I've decided to do is open up comments for any and all to post (that includes you, Fran and Krista) you can post where everyone else does. I'll just have to deal with the spam as it comes.

I've not deleted any comments nor have I not not published comments. I love my comments, I neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed my comments.........well cept for the spam and the trolls.......those are easily dealt with though. So please bear with me for the short term as we adjust to this new routine.

Big hugs to you all!

And then it hit me...

2006-01-12T15:41:00.000-05:00

I did a count today. Sitting in the middle of my Mental Health II class......

Counting....1, 2, 3

Double take...

FOUR?!?! How can that be?

Not counting the days I have finals, nor the day that I sit for 5 hours for a practice NCLEX exam. Not counting my last clinical day........I have 4 days of class left.

Four.

That's it. I'll be done. Well........there is that little thing about actually passing the classes with a satisfactory grade and all. But, damn. I'll be DONE. I've rarely started something so life changing and seen it through to completion. Hell, I'm a high school drop-out, I was 25 when I finally got my GED. So for me to actually make it through this program, for me, is something.

I guess right now I'm just a bit overwhelmed by the thought of it all.

Still gotta finish up though and take my NCLEX before I can call myself a nurse, but hell, I've gotten this far, I know I'll make it the rest of the way. Seems that the hardest part is behind me.

Just keep prayin for me and keep ya fingers crossed, still got a few more weeks of studying yet to do..............back to my hole, I'll be back at some point to let yanno how things are progressing.

Just a little funny on a Monday....

2006-01-02T13:03:00.000-05:00

I can't believe I didn't know what today was! I think I've had just too much time off from school! Tomorrow it's back to the old grind........so don't expect to see me too terribly much till classes are done. I'll be back and in full force on January 25th....or there abouts. Much love and big hugs to you all.

Shannon

On a lighter note...

2005-12-30T22:04:00.000-05:00

I'm coming up with some New Years' resolutions...

Lose some weight, haven't decided how much at the moment, however I think I'll go for 10% right now. Keep it reasonable and maintainable. Pass the Ben & Jerry's.
By the years' end, I'd like to be able to ~~run~~ okay, walk a 10k. I can do a 5k right now, I'd just like to up my mileage and get it all done in the same day. Pass the Ben & Jerry's........Please.
Stop smoking. Yeah I know, I gave it up nearly 2 years ago. I just want to be able to say a resolution that I know I'll be able to stick to. Pass me a spoon willya?
Graduate. Yeah, I'd like to get to graduate. Preferrably in Febraury. However if that doesn't pan out, June is a good alternative. Anyone got a napkin I can use?
Get back over to London at least once. See all the stuff I didn't get to see the first time around. I need some fudge sauce to go with this Ben & Jerry's.
Get up to Montreal and harrass one of the several people that helped me to maintain my sanity this past year........then pinch her boyfriend's cheek........not the one on his face. That way I can be properly accused of sexual harrassment. Whipped cream anyone?
Be more gracious and understanding of those who upset me the most.
Midyear, review this list and see how many days I was able to keep all of my resolutions (except number 3...that one's an automatic keeper) and then dive in for some more Ben & Jerry's.

Whoever's got the nuts and the cherry for on top of this Ben & Jerry's gastrointestinal delight is going to be my new bestestest friend. Just let yourself in the backdoor and come on downstairs. You'll find me in front of the computer in a sugar stupor.

Till then, tell me what resolutions your going to make........then break ;)

I forgive you...

2005-12-28T23:39:00.000-05:00

Even though you will never think you've done anything wrong.
Because I am better than you give me credit for.
Because the more I resent you, the more I allow you to have control over me and my emotions.
Because in the grand scheme of things, I only have to spend a few hours of one day a year with you and I do it for those I love and respect, I do it for them and them alone.
Because I can.
Because I like who I am alot better when you aren't controlling how I feel about myself.
Most importantly...

I forgive you in spite of yourself, just because, I will always know the truth, whether you choose to acknowledge it or not.

*~*~*However if there are ever any more snide fat comments, all deals are off!*~*~*

Yeah......I feel better! Now I feel like I can start the new year off with a clean slate. At least for me.

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2005-12-26T09:52:00.000-05:00

Fran & Krista...

You may want to skip this entry. Love ya!

Every so often it needs to be said...

2005-12-23T23:46:00.000-05:00

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

I needed that.

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2005-12-19T07:20:00.000-05:00

Don't you just hate a smartass employee?

Christmas's of years gone by...

2005-12-18T10:29:00.000-05:00

Can never be reclaimed.

Tragically.

As a child, I grew up poor, abused physically & sexually, alone (both as an only child and the child of a single working mother). The times I felt like I was a part of something bigger? Better? Like I mattered?.....Take a guess......cummon.......Take a guess.

Yep, you got it. During Christmas. For that matter all the holidays.

I got to hang out with the closest people I could call sisters....My cousins. These are the daughters of my mother's sister. When we all got together it would be a house full. Kids running, laughing, playing. While the adults played poker (yeah before it was so popular) and drink spiked eggnog. It always smelled like warm, fresh baked cookies. Even when the oven was cold and hadn't had a thing in it for a day or more. No matter where the gathering, it always felt like home.

As some of you know, recently I've been remembering these holidays with fondness. Growing up, my aunt was more of a mother to me than my own mom. Probably because I could relate to my aunt moreso than I could the crazy lady they stuck me with at the hospital. My aunt and I would and could talk for hours on the phone. By the time we'd hang up, our cheeks were sore from laughter and our ears bleeding from having to rip the phone away because it took root to our head.

Then after my grammy died, that changed. The calls less frequent, shorter in length, not so warm and inviting. In the past year, they'd pretty much stopped altogether. A couple of nights ago this played heavily on my mind. So much so that when I should have passed out from sheer exhaustion, my mind was racing as to what I should say in a letter that I was planning on writing. The following day after only having a handful of hours of sleep, I was out of bed and hitting the computer and talking to those that I seek advice from first. All were in agreement. Send an e-mail. So I carefully wrote what I thought to be a good letter. Letting my aunt know that I miss my family, that I miss her. Heck, even in the past 6 months, her occasional e-mail and frequent jokes had stopped. It made me wonder why. So all of the people that I spoke to thought the letter was a good one (of course I contacted everyone back and had them read it) and that I should send it. So I did.

Not more than a couple of hours later, there came a banging on the door. It was the postman to deliver a care package from the same aunt. You could have knocked me over with a feather. Yeah I was stunned to say the least. I figured any day now I'd get the same e-mail I got from my aunt last year, stating that times were tight and she couldn't afford anything for Christmas. Which to me was not what Christmas was about. I didn't care about the presents. Not then. Not now. Never really have. So I called my aunt to let her know that I got her package. To let her know that she had mail. That I sent the mail hours before the package arrived. I was then reminded of why it was that I found myself not so enthused as to call her now as much as I did when I was younger. I had sent the e-mail in an effort to rekindle something so that my family wouldn't disintegrate. I thought I'd extend the olive branch (although, I don't know what I've done to have to try to make amends for) and then see where it went from there. Yeah well.....Some things (and attitudes) never change (no matter how much we'd like for them to).

For example,

I can remember back to a conversation that my aunt and I had so many years ago where I was talking to her about how I missed the Christmas gatherings we had when I was a kid. Her reply? "Of course you do dear, you always got a ton of gifts". Nah, it wasn't that. I enjoyed the company of my family. That one comment that she made hurt me worse I think, than any comment someone could make. I thought.....No......I believed.....That she knew me better than that. That she understood my heart and knew that it wasn't the gifts but the family that I missed. Hell, I got money, I can buy whatever it is (and often do) that I want. I don't need to rely on the kindess of others to obtain the "things" that I want.

All I've ever really wanted was a family.

I miss mine.

*~*~*Just so you know...This is not the same person that I was on a rant about a couple of days ago.*~*~*

*~*~*Update: I know by now she's read the e-mail because she's forwarded some crap e-mail. Yet she's still not bothered to actually write anything in response to what I wrote, letting her know how much she and the family have been missed and wondering why it is it all fell apart. Guess that let's me know where I stand. Ironic how so much can be said without saying a word.*~*~*

Given yesterday's rant...

2005-12-18T10:07:00.000-05:00

I thought this was appropriate. (If ya missed it, go back a day)

A Christmas Story

'Twas the night before Christmas--Old Santa was pissed.
He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks.
I have a good mind to scrap the whole works!

I've busted my ass for damn near a year,
Instead of "Thanks Santa"--what do I hear?
The old lady bitches cause I work late at night.
The elves want more money--The reindeer all fight.

Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids.
Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that things would get better
Those assholes from the IRS sent me a letter,
They say I owe taxes--if that ain't damn funny
Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?

And the kids these days--they all are the pits
They want the impossible--Those mean little shits
I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls...Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yo's--No request for them,
They want computers and robots...they think - I'm IBM!

Flying through the air...dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
I'm quitting this job there's just no enjoyment
I'll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment.

There's no Christmas this year now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde.. I'm going SOUTH for the season

Don't hate me so much just yet...

2005-12-17T18:33:00.000-05:00

You can still have a grand laugh at my expense.

Remember how I was so excited about getting all of my Christmas shopping done so early? While most people that I buy gifts for consider them thoughtful and spot on, I've just recently found out that there is one person on my list who is not so grateful nor gracious for my efforts. Given that I've already got the pressies bought and wrapped, I've come to find that cash is the gift that keeps (supposedly) on giving (yeah, right, my ass it does!). So apparently in all the years past this person that I've bought for not only has not appreciated the thoughtfulness and the extra effort I've gone through to get them gifts that are not only one of a kind but presents that they wouldn't necessarily buy for themselves. Gifts that considerable amounts of time and effort have gone into purchasing. Now with the holiday fast approching and only a week away, I've found out that my thoughtfulness and consideration and all the effort that I've put into these particular presents are a complete waste of time because, to use this person's verbage....."I don't know why Shannon bothers, I always hate her gifts" (I am paraphrasing to some extent there, but not by much).

Someone please shoot me now. As well, leave a guess as to who the person is in my comments section, also, let me know who does this to you. We can commiserate together. Moonie and Fran, you are disqualified from guessing as you already know who it is. All others guess away at the individual who has deemed it their own life's personal mission and duty to make MY life a living hell.

Some people, you can't live with 'em, ya can't shoot 'em.

Ever wonder...

2005-12-16T08:05:00.000-05:00

Why people hate class reunions?

Yep......now yanno why I've not gone to any of mine!

Personally, I'm not a firm believer in being PC, those that are just take it too far....As Pauline can attest to!

2005-12-14T12:00:00.000-05:00

From: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
To: All Employees
Date: 4th November 2005
Re: Office Christmas Party

I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House.

There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols. Please feel free to sing along. Don't be surprised if the Managing Director shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1.00 p.m. Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time, however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets. This gathering is only for employees! The Managing Director will make a special announcement at the Party.

I wish a Merry Christmas to you and your family.

Sincerely,

Pauline

***************************************************************

From: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
To: All Employees
Date: 5th November 2005
Re: Holiday Party

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Chanukah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on we're calling it our 'Holiday Party'. The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians.

There will be no Christmas tree or Christmas carols sung. We will have other types of music for your enjoyment. Happy now?

Happy Holidays to you and your family,

Pauline

***************************************************************

From: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
To: All Employees
Date: 6th November 2004
Re: Holiday Party

Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, you didn't sign your name. I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only", you wouldn't be anonymous anymore!!! How am I supposed to handle this? Somebody?! ANYBODY?!?!

Forget about the gift exchange, no gift exchange allowed now since the Union Officials feel that $10.00 is too much money and Management believes $10.00 is a little cheap. NO GIFT EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED.

Pauline.

***************************************************************

From: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
To: All Employees
Date: 7th November 2005
Re: Holiday Party

What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20th begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours.

There goes the party! Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs. Perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party or else package everything up for you to take home in a little foil doggy bag. Will that work? Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women will get the table closest to the toilets. Gays are allowed to sit with each other, lesbians do not have to sit with gay men, each will have their own table. Yes, there will be flower arrangements for the gay men's table too. To the person asking permission to cross dress - no cross dressing allowed. We will have
booster seats for short people. Low fat food will be available for those on a diet. We cannot control the salt used in the food, so we suggest those people with high blood pressure taste the food first. There will be fresh fruits as dessert for diabetics. The restaurant cannot supply "No Sugar" desserts. Sorry!

Did I miss anything?!?!?!?!?!

Pauline

***************************************************************

From: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
To: All F******g Employees
Date: 8th November 2005
Re: The F******g Holiday Party

Vegetarian pricks - I've had it with you people!!! We're going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death", as you so quaintly put it, you'll get your f******g salad bar, including organic tomatoes, but you know tomatoes have feelings too. They scream when you slice them. Oh yes, I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them scream right NOW!

I hope you all have a rotten holiday. Drink, drive, and die!

The Bitch from HELL!!!

***************************************************************

From: John Bishop - Acting Human Resources Director
To: All Employees
Date: 9th November 2005
Re: Pauline Lewis and Holiday Party

I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Pauline Lewis a speedy recovery, and I'll continue to forward your cards to her.

In the meantime, the Management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and instead, give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd December off with full pay.

Happy Holidays to one and all.

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2005-12-12T06:58:00.000-05:00

Wonder who gets it for him, eh?

$&@*!!!!

2005-12-09T06:41:00.000-05:00

There was talk yesterday that there may not be any school because we had a winter snow alert.......read that to mean........we had ALOT of snow coming in a short amount of time.

We thought we'd have a snow day (school's closed because of inclimate weather), yeah, this is what we get for thinking...

Do you see Columbus Public Schools on that list?!!? Nooooooooooooooo

Not only that, but the website we're supposed to check has a dark blue background with a black font.......uhhhhh yeah........I can see the wisdom in doing that. Make the damn people go blind before they can find out if they have to go to school or not. Then once at school they have to drop out and re-enroll over at the school for the blind because some freakin IDIOT can't put two brain cells together to figure out that blue and black truly do NOT go together.

Yeah I wanted a snow day........can ya tell?

$&@*!!!!

[Here endth my rant]

I realized something earlier this week...

2005-12-08T16:23:00.000-05:00

Romeo is 14 years old now, he's getting to be an old man so to speak (well, at least for a cat he is). Then I realized that I hardly have any pictures of him and I together. I thought I'd remedy that. This is what I got for my efforts.

What do you think? I was thrilled with the result of this photo because it really shows how affectionate he is. When I'm at my desk, if he's not curled up on the desk with his head wedged between my breasts (I guess you can call them feline pillows of joy.....I guess *dramatic eyeroll*) or; he's putting his head down to nuzzle at my neck or face (if I happen to look down for whatever reason) or where ever else he can nuzzle (yeah you can tell at times he's a male).....this is his way and what makes him such a very special part of my family.

No one else can love unconditionally like a pet can.

No way for the love of God or money would I let anyone...

2005-12-07T15:23:00.000-05:00

Get near my hair with one of these!

The things you come across when taking a study break.

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2005-12-05T06:24:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas!!

You could say this was a very productive day...

2005-12-04T20:32:00.000-05:00

For a Sunday.

First off, I got alot of homework done today. Helps when you DVR the shows you want to watch and spend that time working. Second off, it also helps when your once dashing pirate helps about too. Now I can't say he's a bum and scratchs himself while grunting and watching football. That I could forgive. Afterall, he's a man. No, I can't say anything like that, because when he works, he works hard. It's just getting him started is the problem.

He's gotten into this recycling kick and dragged me with him. So we make it a point to recycle our soda cans(and pretty much anything else recyclable). After all we empty enough of them (ask any of our family and friends, they can attest to that fact), we could gather enough aluminum between the two of us to help expand the networking capabilities for our cell phone carrier.

So today while I was working on my homework, he was working on the mundane things like emptying the cans out in the recycling bin. When he was done he came downstairs to let me know I need to make a run to the recycling center because things are due to get emptied. He also informed me that we had an escape attempt. "Oh no, which cat was it?" All I could think was that one of the cats got out while he was zipping in and out of the house. Mentally, I'm running down the list of cats, thinking of the 2 that try to pull that stunt every time a door is opened. "Jr.?", "No", "Romeo?", "Nope", "The grey one?", "No, not hime", "Dale?!?!" (who never tries to get out of the house), "Nope not Dale neither", he informs me. "Then who?!?!", I asked really confused. Then proceeds to toss the little heathen onto my desk....

Apparently he was in a load of cans that were due to go out and I didn't know he fell in. Let me first explain...I bought him and his twin brother as toys for my neice figuring with the changing and glowing colors she would love it. It was only after I got home that I noticed the tag that said for Ages 3+ .......grrrrrr she's gonna be 2 next month. However, given he and his twin brother were such cuties I couldn't very well send them back out into the dark and the cold *ahem*.

So they now live with me, one on my night stand, the other in the bathroom.

Cute eh?

.............oh yeah, in all the cleaning I came across this pic, figured it was good for a laugh.

Big hugs to all, hope ya had a great weekend and an even better week ahead!

What let's you know...

2005-12-01T12:39:00.000-05:00

It's Christmas time?

For most Americans, at least the ones I know, it's when at the end of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade when you see Santa Claus coming down Broadway in his sleigh being pulled along by his 8 reindeer (read that to mean a giant ass float pulled by a tractor).

For some Americans it could be something as silly as hearing the old time favorite Christmas Carol "Grandma got ran over by a reindeer", for others it's Black Friday. In case you didn't know....Black Friday is the Friday after Thanksgiving when all retail hell breaks loose and crazy people get up at the butt-crack of dawn (read that to mean 4:30am....yes, I know of a particular person who did just that this year)and get in line to buy stuff super cheap that they most likely wouldn't even accept for free otherwise.

Then still others know it's Christmas time when they get to see their first Christmas special........yanno the deluge of programs that most all of us have grown up on since we were kids. Or when they can drive around their neighborhood and see the Christmas lights on their neighbors houses........especially that one guy at the end of the street on the corner who has his house so lit up that it's frequently mistaken for an emergency landing strip! (We know when he turns on the lights each evening because the power dims at our house a quarter of a mile away!)

For me........it's being able to go to McDonald's and order an Eggnog Milkshake!

Yes, that's right, an Eggnog Milkshake.

Now I consider us Americans lucky, not because we got Eggnog Milkshakes or Santa's big butt being hauled about midtown Manhattan on Thanksgiving, but because we at least have something that indicates the "start" of the Christmas season. I know that over in the UK, they really don't have anything to speak of. As for Canadians...I'll leave that to the triplets (Moonie, Sue & Rae) to let us know of anything in particular in their country that marks the beginning of the season.

Now, for all of you, regardless as to where it is you are from....I think it would be cool to hear from everyone and find out what particular event/custom/whatever it is.......thing that occurs that lets you know that Christmas is right around the corner.

Don't be shy, speak up and let me know what it is.....After all......You wouldn't want to get a lump of coal in your stocking for not playing well with others, would you?

"How was your day at school today, Shannon?"

2005-11-29T22:05:00.000-05:00

"Well today I got to stab a classmate!"......er...[That just sounds wrong Shan]..."I got to poke and prod this one chick in my class!".....*ahem*.....[no no no, that's no good neither]. Well, crap, how do I explain this then?

Ah-HAAAAAAAA!! I got to start my first IV today on a real live person!....Tragically, it wasn't a patient, but it WAS a person and not a dummy.....erm......[Don't go there Shan]. Then in turn the ~~dummy~~ other nursing student got to stab/poke & prod me!

The back of my hand is only just now starting to stop throbbing as well as the crook of my arm. My classmate was a nervous, jittery, high-strung older lady who I absolutely adore. However [yanno there would be a "but" didn't you?] I thought she was gonna kill me! Given enough time she's gonna be great. So after she got done ~~torturing~~ stabbing me, I got to stab her...*insert evil grin here*.

I did great, got the IV needle in and got my flashback (that's how you know you got the needle in the vein) but I didn't get a flow of blood (that shows that the IV is actually in the vein).....so the instructor is coaching me on how to get the flow that I'm searching for. I keep pulling back on the IV praying the whole time that I don't pull it out (that would be a giant bad, because I would have then failed at the skills task and who knows when I would have gotten another chance to do it...starting IV's for an LPN are a rare thing) and hoping at some point soon I'd get the flow....then I got it....OH BOY did I get it! She started bleeding like a stuck pig. When I saw all the blood (lemme tell ya there was alot) I started to cry because I realized that I was the reason she was bleeding like she was. Then oddly enough, I didn't hear my other classmates or the instructor (found out later that the girl I was working on was threatening me with bodily harm if I screwed up and flunked...which would have been the outcome if the IV had come out all the way....the other classmates were making jokes and the instructor was hushing them up)....it was like it all became muffled and muted, I don't think I've ever focused so hard on getting one thing in my life.

All I know was I was able to guide the IV back into the vein where it belonged and not straight through the vein like it was and I got my IV certification! Which just means in non-nursing terms......I have increased my skills base and will get paid the same amount of money for more responsibiility.

Great eh? At the same time.....god that sucks! lol

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2005-11-28T06:57:00.000-05:00

'Tis the season and all that, I think this will be the time that I'll be doing this sort of thing. No better time of year to share these with you. Right?

For those who know and those who don't...

2005-11-27T11:13:00.000-05:00

Mr. Dashing in his brand new eyepatch is doing well.

Last Wednesday he got some "thing" in his eye, couldn't open it and was having trouble. After questioning him like I was the Gestapo, he would say "Nah, I'm okay" and then we'd try to figure out what to do from there as it seemed it wasn't truly an "emergency" requireing a trip to the ED.

After spending 2 days winking at both men and women alike and on Friday no longer able to hold both eyes open, he finally agreed that we needed to seek out medical treatment.

Taking him to the ED, waiting and studying while Frannie and Knapp #1 stayed the night at the house (it's literally a 3 block walk from the hospital), he finally got the medical attention he should have gotten 2 nights before, just not realizing it.

What we found is a metal sliver embedded in his eyeball and some serious abrasions. The doctors were cool about letting me see what all was going on (knowing I was a nursing student) and letting me stay and watch. They used a combination of a cotton swab and a burr (read that to mean the burr was actually a needle!) and Knapp #2 just laid there and took it like a troooper. Hell, I can't even put in contacts because I can't take seeing anything coming at my eye! A friend of mine had something like this happen to them and they had to clamp his head! So the fact that he laid there and didn't even flinch was impressive to say the least.

Granted he was numbed up beyond belief, but that's besides the point. I had a good laugh at his expense though. When it came time to take some pain pills, he fought it. I told him if he didn't want to take the 2 they were offering (Vicodin!) then just take the one and we'll pocket the other, just in case he'd need it later. When we left the ED and took the prescribed antibiotic medicine to be filled, he didn't want to get the pain prescription filled. However, given enough time, I think everyone would change their mind......and he did! Yesterday morning he got up, sits to the side of the bed, arms on his legs, bent over.....groaning "I think I am going to change my mind on those pain pills..."

He had a huge ugly silver eyepatch on his eye that made him feel rather self conscience so I found him a black eye patch. He was like a little kid putting on his halloween costume!.......hence his new nickname of Mr. Dashing. He doesn't feel people are gawking at him for being a klutz.....more because now he's a man of intrigue. [Pardon me while I go roll my eyes] Who knew he could be so vain?

Before...

After...

Ulf meet Senor Poofy Pants....Senor Poofy Pants meet Ulf

2005-11-24T19:13:00.000-05:00

It's been a long day, full of laughs, punkin pie and games.

The boys (Knapp 1 & 2) are in the basement playing Medal of Honor and the ~~outlaws~~ erm....I mean Inlaws and Frannie and Mom are all upstairs whinging about the cold and not being able to hear the tv because everyone was talking.

Personally I'd rather listen to the boys try and slaughter each other and call the other names and make fun of their dying sounds. At least that's a conflict I won't want to blow up and say something I shouldn't at. Watching the boys, while not educational (cept for a few new swear words) nor completely high quality entertainment, can be quite a chuckle.

So all in all my turkey day was a good one.

How was yours?

Happy Thanksgiving...

2005-11-24T12:54:00.000-05:00

I've so much to be thankful for this year and I just wanted to take this time to wish you well and hope that your holiday season is the best and brightest ever.

Consider this as a dietary aide if you ate to much this year.

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2005-11-21T07:01:00.000-05:00

Enough to make any cheap ass Limey proud...

2005-11-18T20:23:00.000-05:00

So one of my dearest friends and I and my godson (the goddaughter went to a girl scout ~~brainwashing~~ campout and her hubby worked late)decided that it was up to us girls to entertain ourselves. Entertain ourselves we did!

We went to our favorite restaurant and after being seated, Natalie leans in and says, "Who's birthday is it this time? I'm dyin for some caramel pie." The waiter comes and gets our drink order and before he has the chance to dart off, we let him know who was on what bill and I made it a point to mention that Nat is a pain in the ass for not paying for my meal as it was my birthday afterall.

The joke was on me, after paying our bill and about to set out for the night to do some shopping (as girls are wont to do) I hear this racous clapping noise. The noise gets progressivly louder as it seems to be getting nearer our table...."Oh fuck" I forgot about the noise they make when it's your birthday! Natalie just sat there and laughed and licked her chops as they set the caramel pie on the table.

Yeah, that teaches me a lesson doesn't it?

Yeah, it does. Because next week it's going to be HER birthday!

BTW.......My birthday is in June and hers is at the end of December.

What would you do for a free dessert? Leave a comment and let everyone know.

Natalie, Rick Springfield, Samantha (my goddaughter)

One Day @ A Time...

2005-11-15T21:32:00.000-05:00

Well I'm at the 80 day mark as to how many days are left till graduation.

I have 5 clinical rotations this level.

So far, I've gotten 2 down, 3 more to go.

The third is nearly complete, while the last 2 are going to be really tough rotations, this I already know. Yet, knowing that I've more behind me than ahead of me, is kinda nice. Even if they are the last two, there is a certain amount of satisfaction in knowing that it'll be hard work but worth the effort.

And for all of this I only have one thing to say...

THANK GOD IT'S ALMOST OVER!!!

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2005-11-14T00:02:00.000-05:00

One can only hope that this week goes better than the previous two. The only thing to have made up for the past few weeks is this past weekend. Many hugs and blessings go out to those that need them!

Much credit goes out for the inspiration of this post...Love ya Rae...ya HO! :P

A face you can't help but fall in love with...

2005-11-11T22:50:00.000-05:00

Too horrific a story not to share with everyone...

2005-11-10T17:40:00.000-05:00

A special thanks goes out to Suebee for sending this story to me.

Sometimes nature is cruel, but there is also a beauty in that cruelty.

The alligator as one of the ultimate predators can fall victim to the kind of implemented 'team work' strategy which is possible due to the pack mentality and social structure of canines.

Click here to see the remarkable photograph courtesy of Nature Magazine - but not if you're squeamish!

'Tis the freakin season...

2005-11-10T07:06:00.000-05:00

I can't freakin believe it!!!

I'm so damn lucky! Now normally I'm not one of those people that *achoo* has to be the first to go out and buy the newest and latest gadgets and gizmo's.

I'm so damn lucky because I'm given nice little *sniffle* pressies as tokens of affection from my classmates *cough* and my patients.

This is one *snorting snot* gift I wish some bastid would have kept!!!

I'fth gotta codeeeeeeeeeeeee *crying*

With gifts given to me like these........do I really wanna be a nurse? I'm anal retentive when it comes to handwashing, I'm doing it constantly. Some bugs though get ya when you least expect it.

Damn critters

Prayer...(No where can you tell the difference more then in how the sexes pray)

2005-11-08T05:22:00.000-05:00

FEMALE PRAYER

Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man, who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart, and strong.
One whe loves to listen long.

One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's gainfully employed,
When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.

Pulls out my chair and opens my door,
Massages my back and begs to do more.
Send me a man who'll make love to my mind,
Knows what to answer to "how big is my behind?"

I pray that this man will love me to no end,
And always be my very best friend...Amen

MALE PRAYER

I pray for a deaf-mute, sex maniac with huge
boobs who owns a liquor store and a bass boat.
I know this doesn't rhyme but I don't care...Amen.

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2005-11-07T06:59:00.000-05:00

10 Pet Peeves Dogs have about Humans
Yanno the things that really make us dogs crazy!

1. Blaming your farts on me... not funny... not funny at all !!!

2. Yelling at me for barking.. I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!

3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway?

4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose... stop it!

5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons (or red hair dye). Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.

6. The slight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo! What a proud moment for the top of the food chain.

7. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!

8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.

9.Dog sweaters. Hello ???, Haven't you noticed the fur?

10. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous.

Now lay off me on some of these things. We both know who's boss here !!!

(You don't see me picking up your poop do you???)

*~*~*Special thanks goes out to Moonie and her owner ~~Charmin~~ Shinoo for participating in todays little funny. We all hope you had a good laugh!*~*~*

Do something warm and fuzzy today...

2005-11-06T11:30:00.000-05:00

Here's the url if ya need it...

http://i3.photobucket.com/albums/y76/xxxgingaslappaxxx/Blog%20Decorations/th8c2e6ad4.gif

Use abundently and in good health!

All I ask is that you not hate me...

2005-11-05T12:36:00.000-05:00

I'm done Christmas Shopping!! WOOHOO!!!

Yeah, Yeah I know.....I'll go hide until it's safe.

You're put where you're supposed to be...

2005-11-02T14:23:00.000-05:00

The past few days have been rather chaotic and intense. This rotation that I'm on right now (and done with so quickly) is in OB/postpartum. How is it chaotic and intense you may wonder?

Well...Monday...I go to the unit I'm to be on for the day (postpartum) and I'm in the nursery. Oh. My. Gosh. Those newborns are precious! No bigger than a minute and totally dependent on the nearest adult to meet any and all needs they have. Not just their parents, but us, total strangers. It reaffirms my belief that it really does take a village to raise a child. One of the physicians doing a newborn assessment, turns out to be my daughters' physician some 18 + years ago. I debated on whether or not to talk to him, if I did, what should I say? Didn't matter I supposed, just that I was able to bring myself to talk to him is what counted. I finally screwed up the courage midmorning only to find out he had left the building for another delivery at another facility. To say I was a bit relieved is an understatement. So that was the intense part of Monday. On to the chaotic part. I got to watch a circumcision. Nearly passed out. Stop laughing. It was embarrassing. Ok. Go on, laugh. Feel better? lol......Yeah I know I know. Then I had a patient lose part of her placenta (she was 25 or so weeks with twins who didn't have any fluid...That's a bad thing in case you're wondering), the girl was very sweet, yet..."challenged" and I felt for her because with her being only 25 weeks along. It struck me as well that I don't think she truly understood how severe the situation was. Chances were good she was going to deliver at any moment. Which she did....An hour and a half after I left.

I was sorry that I missed being able to see that, given I was the one to have started the ball rolling in getting her over into Labor and Delivery. That's okay though, because on Tuesday, I got to assist in a delivery, get peed on by the cutest little boy and have that chat with the Doctor that I missed talking to on Monday. Long story short, I told him directly that I wasn't sure what exactly it was that I wanted to say to him. I didn't know what I expected from talking to him. All I knew was that it was important to talk to him. The last time I spoke to him, I was not a nice person. I had just buried my daughter and was rather hateful. So I said the only thing I could think of.

"I'm sorry"

If you ever get the chance to go back and right a wrong. Be it real or imagined. I highly recommend that you do it. You will be so glad you did.

Just a little funny on a Monday...

2005-10-31T06:04:00.000-05:00

Dear Employees:

It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their co-workers. Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated. We do however realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with co-workers.
Therefore, a list of 18 New and Innovative "TRY SAYING" phrases has been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner.

1) TRY SAYING:
I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF:
You don't know what the f___ you're doing.

2) TRY SAYING:
She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF:
She's a ball-busting b__ch.

3) TRY SAYING:
Perhaps I can work late.
INSTEAD OF:
And when the f___ do you expect me to do this?

4) TRY SAYING:
I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF:
No f______ way.

5) TRY SAYING:
Really?
INSTEAD OF:
You've got to be sh__ing me!

6) TRY SAYING:
Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF:
Tell someone who gives a sh__.

7) TRY SAYING:
I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF:
It's not my f______ problem.

8) TRY SAYING:
That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF:
What the f___?

9) TRY SAYING:
I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF:
This sh__ won't work.

10) TRY SAYING:
I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF:
Why the f____ didn't you tell me sooner?

11) TRY SAYING:
He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF:
He's got his head up his a__.

12) TRY SAYING:
Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF:
Eat sh__ and die.

13) TRY SAYING:
So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF:
Kiss my a__.

14) TRY SAYING:
I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF:
F___ it, I'm on salary.

15) TRY SAYING:
I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF:
Shove it up your a__.

16) TRY SAYING:
I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF:
This job sucks.

17) TRY SAYING:
You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF:
Who the h___ died and made you boss?

18 ) TRY SAYING:
He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF:
He's a pr_ck.

Thank You,
Human Resources

It's no wonder...

2005-10-29T10:50:00.000-05:00

this world is vicious and filled with so much hate, when we have people like Fred Phelps for spiritual leaders.

I thought as a society, not just here in America but around the globe, we were a more enlightened community. Getting beyond intolerance and ignorance. I guess that's what I get for thinking eh?

The lack of response to those in need down in New Orleans after Katrina proves once again that the powers that be have no issue with seperatism. That continuing to have segregation of "them" versus "us" (the blacks vs the whites) is acceptable behaviour and that Rosa Parks basically went to her grave fighting a battle that ultimately was in vain.

So how is it that a "spritual leader" can spout off about so much hate? We continue to allow individuals like that to have access to our young and not stand up for what is right will only help to throw our society back into the stone ages. I mean I understand how it is that Christians believe that homosexuality is wrong. Yet it's of my opinion that, that sort of intolerance is only a gateway to more insideous hate and violence. Aren't we supposed to hate the sin but love the sinner? To live an alternate lifestyle is purely individual and quite frankly none of anyone else's business, add to that, the color of a person's skin has absolutely no bearing as to the character of that person. So I just don't understand how it is that people can justify their behaviour and claim to be christian and still look themselves in the mirror.

Isn't it about time we stood up and said enough is enough? After all, it's not the color or the sexuality of a person that's the problem and the cause of all our societal woes.

It's Phelps and people like him.

I firmly believe....

2005-10-25T17:28:00.000-05:00

That there is not enough therapy for me to recover from the shock of what I just saw...

Sweet isn't it?

Now imagine the same scene except that instead of rolling about on the livingroom carpet, my cat somehow managed to drag some of my and my mother's (she did laundry and didn't get it all done nor taken back upstairs) knickers into a pile and is now rolling about on them as if they were lined with catnip!

Pardon me while I go call my therapist!

While I'm doing that, tell me if you have a pet, what weird and disgusting thing it does.....I don't want to be the only one with a freak for a cat!

What's your "freaky" thing?

2005-10-24T20:21:00.000-05:00

I got to thinking after talking my girlfriend Jen, that we all have our little "freaky" pet peeve thing that sets us off. Yanno that one thing that just gives you the heebeegeebee's or just makes you gag uncontrollably.

I've decided that mine is bread crumbs in the butter. *shudder* Worse yet, having the butter sit out, get all melted and liquified and seperated then having it go back into the fridge to get solid again.......all the while bread crumbs are floating about. *insert gagging noise here* Yeah, my mom is good for doing that and it just sends me over the edge every time. I've tried the "this-is-my-butter-and-that-is-your-butter" strategy. With little to no luck. It's like talking to a brick.

So tell me, what's your "thing"?

You've only got one life to live....make it count

Goodbye, so long and thanks for all the fish...

italian training camp

OOOOooooo........lookit tha purdy colors...

No regrets or sad goodbyes...

This just in...

2,996...

In light of my recent birthday...

Talk about heebeegeebee's...

10 Minutes never felt more like an eternity...*~*Update 2*~*

Oy!

10 Minutes never felt more like an eternity...*~*Update 1*~*

10 Minutes never felt more like an eternity...

I say be careful who you mess with...

Ohhh, here we go again...

Why I love my job, reason #192...

What do I do? ~Update 2~

What do I do? ~Update 1~

What do I do?

How do you say "Oh $hit" in french?

Just a little funny on a Monday...

The store, it has been found!

Just a thought...

Bored? Need to kill a few minutes?

Has anyone else noticed...

Just a little funny on a Monday...

Last night was my first ever...

I have never...

A funny thing happened on the way through the checkout...

WooHoo!!!

Just a little funny on a Monday...

Did you remember??

I can live with that...

I found out this weekend that Easter is coming...

Approved = I passed!!!!!!!!!

Pending...

How many times...

Getting close...

Happy Birthday & Wish Me Luck!

"You may be getting a medal?!?!"

Some things you just can't help but laugh at...

*Gulps* Oh my, what have I gotten myself into?!

What number are you?

Be careful who you start up with........you may regret it...

I can't wait to become a crazy old lady!!!

It's spring isn't it?

Did you know...

Just a little funny on a Monday...

Now what?

Just a little funny on a Monday...

I got by with a little help from my friends...

Where in the hell did this come from?!?!

Just a little funny on a Monday...

The big day finally arrived!!!

FAQ's...

WooFREAKINHooooooooo for me!

Salem's cover has been blown...(for Toni)

Just a little funny on a Monday....

Just a few little funnies on a Monday...

Sorry for the inconvience as of late...

And then it hit me...

Just a little funny on a Monday....

On a lighter note...

I forgive you...

Just a little funny on a Monday...

Every so often it needs to be said...

Just a little funny on a Monday...

Christmas's of years gone by...

Given yesterday's rant...

Don't hate me so much just yet...

Ever wonder...

Personally, I'm not a firm believer in being PC, those that are just take it too far....As Pauline can attest to!

Just a little funny on a Monday...

$&@*!!!!

I realized something earlier this week...

No way for the love of God or money would I let anyone...

Just a little funny on a Monday...

You could say this was a very productive day...

What let's you know...

"How was your day at school today, Shannon?"

10 Minutes never felt more like an eternity...~Update 2~

10 Minutes never felt more like an eternity...~Update 1~

Gulps Oh my, what have I gotten myself into?!